A.C.O.G. - Adult Child of God

Sunday is Father’s Day. I have never given a great deal of energy or attention to Father’s Day. I always gave or mailed my father the obligatory card in recognition, but I did my best to find a generic one with very little sentiment. My father, who died in 2003, was for all intents and purposes, for most of my life an absentee father. He traveled a great deal when I was growing up. When he was home he was not available. From the time I knew the meaning of the word, I referred to my father as an “alcoholic.” Until I was 35, there were very few times I saw my father sober. In 1995, he stopped drinking on doctor’s orders after a stay in the hospital due to a heart condition. As a result, during the last years of his life we were able to enjoy some connection. For that, I am grateful.

For years, I blamed my father for many of the things I judged wrong with my life and for my various dysfunctional behaviors. According to my therapist, I exhibited classic characteristics and behaviors of “adult children of alcoholics” (A.C.O.A.) which were outlined in the book, Adult Children of Alcoholics, by Dr. Janet Woititz published in 1983. I wore the label defiantly and often used it to justify my actions.

I feel sad knowing that I did not find a true place of empathy and forgiveness for my father until after his death. Today, I recognize that I held static images of my father as an “alcoholic” and of me as an “adult child of an alcoholic.” As a result, I continued to live the experiences of both. Today, I am making different choices.

Unity and other New Thought teaching taught me the power of consciousness and the power of the word, both spoken and in thought. Charles Fillmore, the cofounder of Unity, said “All metaphysicians recognize that certain words, used persistently, mold and transform conditions in mind, body, and affairs.”¹ Nonviolent Communication® (a.k.a. Compassionate Communication²), the work of Marshall Rosenberg Ph.D., taught me the power of connecting with others and myself beyond the labels.

I have learned that I am who I say am. I am that which I profess because speaking my word aligns me with the vibration of that which I claim. When I say I am an “adult child of an alcoholic” I align my mind with all the energy associated with that label. And, when I align my mind, and thus fill my consciousness with that vibration, my thoughts, words and behaviors align equivalently. I become who I say I am. As I continue to claim it, I continue to live it.

Additionally, I have learned that, even though my father drank a great deal, it is not only unkind and unfair, but also violent and untrue to continue to define him, or anyone, according to behaviors. My father was, as each of us is, a unique and wondrous child of God in dynamic expression. We, in any moment, can align with that knowing and our lives can immediately begin to manifest differently.

I know little about his childhood because he chose not to share it. I have suspicions that it was not joyful. I believe my father numbed the pain of his human experience by consuming a mood altering substance. I, too, have consumed mood altering substances and engaged in numbing behaviors to escape emotional pain. I now have great empathy and compassion for him in his suffering. I realize I am not so different from my father. Further, he and I are not so different from all human beings. We all share the needs for love and belonging, and we all feel pain when those needs are not met. And, we often attempt to meet those needs or to numb the pain, by making choices that ultimately do not achieve either. I have, however, learned to make different choices.

While I am still not completely free from the personality traits and behaviors associated with a classic A.C.O.A., I no longer identify as that. I prefer A.C.O.G. (Adult Child of God). I claim that as my truth, and as Mr. Fillmore said, my word “molds and transforms the conditions” of my life in alignment to it. Through prayer and meditation, I align my mind with all the Life Energy that I imagine God to be. As my consciousness is filled with thoughts and images of God, my words and actions align as well. In this way, I become who I say I am.

As Paul said, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2). I am transformed as I claim who I truly am. My image of my father is transformed as well.

I encourage us all to release the labels we use to identify ourselves and claim our true identities as A.C.O.G. (Adult Children of God). And, through the power of the persistent use of our word, allow our minds to be renewed and our lives transformed.

Join us on Sunday at 10:00 as we honor our earthly fathers and the one “Father” of us all.

¹ Jesus Christ Heals

² I invite you to join J and me on Tuesdays beginning, June 30, from 7:00 to 9:00 p.m. at Unity Church of Denver to learn more about Compassionate Communication. We will offer a 4-week Introductory class, followed by a 5-week Deepening Skills class.

Follow Your Bliss

In his 2005 commencement address to Stanford University, Apple founder, Steve Jobs, told the audience, “For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And, whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something. He went on to encourage the graduates to follow their dreams, and to not waste their lives “living someone else’s life.”

Taken literally the thought that one could live someone else’s life is preposterous. How can a person live a life that is not his own? Of course, it is not possible; however, it is possible and even common for one to live a life that someone else has prescribed for her, perhaps her parents, culture, or even her religion. All too often, we succumb to the pressures of others and do what is “expected” or what we believe will bring us success in the eyes of others. We may not live the life of another, but we often live our lives for another. Often we, as Thoreau said, live “lives of quiet desperation” in an attempt to make a living, be “respectable,” or feel safe and secure. In doing so, we may meet some needs, but we may sacrifice our deepest need, which is to know ourselves as a magnificent expression of the One Life, to connect with the Essence of who we are and who we have come here to be, and to manifest that in the world. In other words, our deepest need is to, as American mythologist, writer and lecturer, Joseph Campbell, said, follow our bliss.

Most of us are most likely familiar with that quote, “Follow your bliss,” but like me, some may have a misconception of what it means to follow our bliss. At one time I thought it meant to discover what brings joy and only do what is fun; ‘bliss’ meant ‘pleasure,’ ‘elation’ and ‘ebullience.’ After further exploration of Campbell’s lectures and writing, I found a greater depth of understanding. The following quotes are taken from The Hero’s Journey: Joseph Campbell on His Life and Work.

“I think the best thing I can say is to follow your bliss. If your bliss is just your fun and your excitement, you’re on the wrong track. Know where your bliss is. And that involves coming down to a deep place in yourself. Your bliss can guide you to that transcendent mystery, because your bliss is the welling up of the energy of the transcendent wisdom within you.”

When we consider that Campbell defines ‘bliss’ as the energy of transcendent wisdom within us, we can clearly see that he was encouraging us to follow what could also be called the “Divine Urge” within us. It is not about feeling blissful 24/7, but about being true to who we are.

Also, following our bliss does not mean that life will always be easy, that we will not face pain and struggle or that we can just sit back and let it happen. On the contrary, following our bliss is, as Campbell says, the hero’s journey. It is a journey that each one must undertake in order to be true to himself.

Campbell also says, “A hero ventures forth from the world of common day into a region of supernatural wonder: fabulous forces are there encountered and a decisive victory is won: the hero comes back from this mysterious adventure with the power to bestow boons on his fellow man.” Some well-known hero journeys from literature include Harry Potter, Luke Skywalker from Star Wars, Frodo Baggins from Lord of the Rings and Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz. It is an age-old theme. Perhaps the best known hero’s journey for those from the Christian tradition is the life of Jesus Christ.

Each of these were called to embark upon the hero’s journey, and even though fear may have arisen, something within them urged them onward as they came face to face with dark and mysterious forces that attempted to dissuade them from their missions. When we choose to follow our bliss we will probably be called upon to come face-to-face with our fears, and in doing so, we are given the opportunity to embrace our own strength and power at a deeper level.

Campbell encourages, 

“You follow [your bliss] and doors will open where there were no doors before, where you would not have thought there’d be doors, and where there wouldn’t be a door for anybody else. There’s something about the integrity of a life. And the world moves in and helps. It really does.” 

When we say “Yes” to the Divine Urge within, we can rest assured that all the power of the Universe rushes in to help. Again, it will not always be easy, but with faith we know that all is provided in the moment it is needed.

“And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” – Steve Jobs

The Divine Urge is the movement of that “transcendent wisdom” in the heart. Intuition is the awareness of our innate wisdom. As Charles Fillmore, the co-founder of Unity said, “All wisdom is implanted in us by divine intelligence.”  He further said, “Wisdom can only be found in its purity at the heart center.” We access wisdom when we consciously center our awareness in the heart, experience serenity, and listen for the still small voice. From this centered consciousness, we receive guidance, and can then take the steps to follow our bliss with courage. ‘Courage’ is derived from the French ‘coeur,’ which translates into English as ‘heart.’  Courage is the willingness to follow where the heart leads, trusting that the heart, the Divine Urge, our bliss, always guides us to the highest and best good for all.

As Steve Jobs said, “Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. As with all matters of the heart, you will know it when you hear it.” 

There are over seven billion people on Earth, and each and every one is a unique expression of the creative energy of the Universe. I have often wondered why there are so many people on the planet. That it takes each one expressing his or her magnificence in order to bring forth the kingdom of heaven is the only plausible reason I can think of. Further, until every last one recognizes the Divine Urge and follows his or her ‘bliss’ we will not fully realize the kingdom. That is how vital it is for us to follow our bliss. Listen! Follow your bliss.

Join us for our service on Sunday as we explore further the concept of following our bliss.

Consciousness is Supply

“If a seeming need appears to you, it occurs to your thought. Therefore you are conscious of it. But your Consciousness is the supply, so It cannot really be aware of a need; It can only be conscious of the supply for that which seemed to be a need. The Conscious Supply existed in and as your Consciousness before the so-called need arose. In other words, when some apparent need or desire occurs to you, it is just that your attention has been called to the supply that is already existent. If the supply were not already there, that which has been miscalled the need would not have arisen.” - Marie Watts from The Ultimate, Your Self Revealed

When I read this, my heart leapt for joy. In just a few sentences, Marie Watts answered a question that I have pondered for some time: What is the difference between ‘need,’ ‘want,’ and ‘desire?’ There is no difference - they are all just concepts of a dualistic mind.

She says that in Consciousness there is no need; therefore, we cannot be aware of need. That which we have misperceived as a ‘need’ is, in reality, our conscious awakening to the ever present supply. The supply, infinite as our Consciousness, is the fulfillment of any thought that we have. Most of us, refer to it as a ‘need,’ ‘want,’ or ‘desire.’ At least that is the premise I had assumed until I read this passage.

Imagine removing those concepts from our minds and those words from our vocabulary. For example, what would our experience be if we immediately realize there is no lack when we have the thought, “I need money”? What if, when we see images of starving children or violence, we see only the fulfillment of the ‘needs’ that they represent? What would it be like, if instead of focusing on the thought, we recognize that the thought arose because the supply is already present? No longer would we experience the pain or suffering of an unmet need, an unfulfilled desire or the lack of something wanted. Instead, we would live in the realization that “Consciousness is the supply.”

It is, however, important for us to realize that this Truth does not allow us to abdicate our responsibility to take action. While Consciousness is the supply, it must be brought forth into form through us. It begins with our conscious awareness of it, continues with our willingness to fill our hearts and minds with the realization of it, and culminates as we actively engage in actions to bring it forth into manifestation. Or, as the African proverb says, “When you pray, pray with your feet moving.”

Unity cofounder Charles Fillmore said,

“The law of supply is a divine law. It is a law of mind and must work through mind. God will not go to the store and bring food to your table, but when you continue to think about God as your real supply, everything in your mind begins to awaken and to contact the divine substance, and as you mold it in your consciousness, ideas begin to come which will connect you with the visible manifestation.”¹ [italics mine]

I hope you are as excited as I am about the unlimited possibilities that this Truth reveals. We are not limited by any outer condition or circumstance. We cannot be aware of a ‘need’ for which there is not already the divine supply.

Join us on Sunday at 10:00 as we explore how we can embrace and live from this truth individually and collectively as a church community and in our shared humanity with all.

¹ Prosperity, Page 68

Minister, Heal Thyself

Over the past week my body has been exhibiting symptoms of a cold. I detest having a cold. In addition to the stuffy head, coughing and headache, I have had very little energy for anything. Besides that, my mind has been foggy and my thinking muddled. I have been tempted to play the victim and tell myself that I am helpless to do anything but wait for the virus to run its course. I also find it tempting to make myself feel better with the notion that the Universe is forcing me to get some much needed rest, an idea I do not give credence to by the way. I do not subscribe to the belief that the Universe (another New Thought name for God) is trying to teach me something. Nor do I believe that I draw illness or anything else into my life so that I can learn a lesson. I do, however, believe that I can choose to learn from every experience. While it is a subtle shift in perspective, I think it is an important one. I am feeling much better and with a clearer mind am able to reflect on what I can choose to learn from this experience.

I have often heard the adage, “Physician, heal thyself.” It is a proverb quoted in Luke 4:23. In our common usage today it infers that one should follow his own prescription and do what he would advise others to do in a situation. In reflecting upon this past week, it occurs to me that I might say to myself, “Minister, heal thyself.” I wonder if I am like the physician who is good at prescribing for others, but does not heed his own advice. In light of this past week, as I reflect on what I believe to be true about healing and wholeness, I must honestly admit that I can choose to more closely live the Truth I know in order to demonstrate healing and wholeness in my life.

Through the words of our co-founders, Charles and Myrtle Fillmore, the Unity movement provides powerful teaching on healing and wholeness and how to demonstrate it in our lives.  Myrtle Fillmore’s Healing Letters, a collection of letters Mrs. Fillmore wrote in response to prayer requests that were sent to Silent Unity, is a valuable resource for these teachings.  I was particularly struck by one of her letters that affirms the power of prayer, but seems to dissuade the writer from the belief that it is somehow magical.  It affirms that while prayer is a powerful practice, it is not magic, and one must take personal responsibility for his or her own demonstration of wholeness.

In her response to two statements from the writer in which he asks to be “sent some healing vibrations” and “to relieve us through Silent Unity healing,” Mrs. Fillmore reminds us all that the path to healing and wholeness is three-fold, involving all aspects of our being: spirit, mind and body.  This three-fold path to healing and wholeness applies to all aspects of our life experiences, including physical health, financial well-being, our relationships with others, and self-expression through our chosen vocation and avocation.  If we are to demonstrate the full expression of all the Good that God is as us, we must realize our Truth in spirit, mind and body.

We know that the spiritual Truth is that each of us is an expression of Divine Intelligence, Substance, and Supply, that which we call “God.”  As the allegorical story in the book of Genesis tells us, we are created in the image and likeness of God. God gave all of Itself at the moment of creation, and we eternally exist in this state of wholeness and perfection.  We only “separate” ourselves from this state of being as we hold the belief that we can be separate. It is a state that can only happen in our minds. Thus, we must keep our minds stayed on the Truth.

The mind, as we understand it, is more than our thoughts - it also includes our feeling nature.  Since our thoughts and feelings are so closely interlinked, it is difficult, if not impossible to determine which comes first. There are those who assert that thoughts elicit feelings, and others will argue the reverse. Because they happen almost simultaneously in most cases, it is of little concern which arises first. For the purposes of healing and wholeness, it only matters that we are aware of our thoughts and feelings and that we intervene on those that are not in alignment with our Truth. Often, our feeling nature will alert us when we are out of harmony with our spiritual Truth. Any feeling that does not have its foundation in peace, love or joy can be our signal that our thoughts are off track and are in need of investigation and realignment.  We establish a consciousness of healing and wholeness as we keep our thoughts and thus our feelings in alignment with the Truth of our being. It is this consciousness which establishes the foundation for the demonstration of life experiences that embodies the fullness of our Truth as it opens us to receive the divine ideas that we are to bring forth into manifestation and sets the stage for our action.

The body, or the physical, is the final aspect of establishing the demonstration of Truth in any aspect of our lives. From the consciousness of Truth, we open ourselves to the wisdom, understanding and imagination, as well as other faculties of our nature which co-founder, Charles Fillmore, identified as “The Twelve Powers of Man.”  We open to the guidance that is available to us in the quiet of our peaceful, loving, joyous minds and we use our powers of strength, will, and power to move forward and take the action that we are called to take in order to bring forth into the physical realm the manifestation of a body, career, relationships, and bank account that mirror the Truth of our nature as God in expression. 

In reflecting upon my week, I think I did a pretty good job at claiming my spiritual Truth through the practice of prayer and meditation. However, I admit that I find it challenging to keep my mind stayed on my spiritual Truth when my body is experiencing anything other than health and vitality. My awareness is easily drawn away from my divine Truth and to the condition instead. I am reminded that it requires commitment to keep the mind focused on the divine idea of wholeness in the midst of the appearance of illness. I affirm, however, that it is an important step in demonstrating wholeness in our bodies and in the body of our affairs. Sometimes, we need help from another who is willing and able to remind us of our Truth when we can’t do it for ourselves. I have often encouraged others to reach out to me and to our prayer chaplains for support. I regret that I did not follow my own prescription.

When we are willing to allow another to hold sacred space for us and invite us into the consciousness of wholeness, we are often amazed and delighted by the insight that comes. In that space of conscious unity and in the clarity of connection we are more open to the guidance of Spirit and are able to hear what is ours to do in the outer to help affect a change in the condition. In my case, that could be going to the doctor, consulting with a nutritionist, knowing which herbal remedies to take, or any number of things I could do to help restore my body to its expression of wholeness.

The most powerful lesson for me through this experience has been the reminder of the value of daily practice. Myrtle Fillmore encourages us to, “Daily declare that your spiritual life and world, your mental life and world, your physical life and world are unified and that you are expressing harmoniously the ideas of the Christ Mind on these three planes.”

Thus, spirit, mind and body must be three-in-one, as one, in order that we may demonstrate healing and wholeness in all areas of our lives.  Minister, heal thyself. Live the Truth you know. Practice what you teach.

Please join us on Sunday for our 10:00 service as we explore further how we can live and demonstrate the Truths we know.

Remember the Sabbath

Recently, I was speaking with a dear friend. She and I have worked together more than once, continue to collaborate on projects, and share personal details about our lives, so she knows me pretty well. During our conversation, seemingly out of the blue, she asked me why I don’t often take vacations. She commented that many ministers and spiritual leaders that she knows take time off to rest and renew themselves, and she was concerned for me since I don’t. I was surprised by the question and didn’t immediately have a rational answer. I don’t recall what I said, but upon reflection I am sure I was defending and justifying. After our call, I contemplated the question, and realized that taking infrequent vacations is only one manifestation of my lack of honoring the need for rest and renewal. And, my guess is that I am not alone.

We all need rest. Our need for rest is as important as our need for sleep. It is an aspect of the natural rhythm of life. While extended time off from our daily activities is often enriching and necessary, we also need to create the space for rest amidst the busyness of our lives on a routine basis.

The conversation reminded me of one of my favorite books, Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in our Busy Lives, by Wayne Muller. I have highlighted passages on nearly every page in my printed copy. I also have the electronic and audible version of the book. I refer to it when I become aware of the need to be reminded to stop and reconnect; apparently, not frequently enough. Reverend Muller reminds us that “Remember the Sabbath to keep it holy” is the only commandment that begins with the word ‘remember,’ denoting that it is something we all know, but have forgotten. In the hurry of our active lives, we forget.

‘24/7’ seems to have become a modern-day mantra in our culture. We have access to just about everything we desire 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We have access to information on the internet anytime day or night. Some of us can work around-the-clock from our home offices if we choose. We can bank, shop or be entertained whenever the urge strikes. We can do most of it without ever leaving the comfort of our own homes. Some wear ‘24/7’ as if it were a badge of honor – “I’m working 24/7 to get this project finished or to drive this deal home”. “I’m BUSY” is now a common response to the question, “how are you?”  Have we accepted constant activity as a part of our value system? In our efforts to accomplish, achieve and accumulate, have we lost the value for rest, renewal, and remembrance? Have we completely abandoned the value of observing the Sabbath?

Throughout time, there have been social taboos, and even laws to restrict activity on the Sabbath. While not as prevalent in many states today, legislators in our country still artificially enforce keeping the Sabbath by imposing “blue laws” which make it illegal for businesses to open, or restrict the items sold, on Sundays. It is currently against the law in Colorado to sell a vehicle on Sunday.

We have attempted to make the Sabbath about what not to do, rather than try to understand its true purpose. As Jesus said, “The Sabbath was made for humankind, not humankind for the Sabbath” (Mark 2:27 NRSV). Regardless of how it has been misunderstood and misused in the past, Sabbath is a sacred concept that, when observed, can serve us well.

Muller says,

“The Sabbath is not a burdensome requirement from some law-giving deity – ‘You ought, you’d better, you must’ – but rather a remembrance of a law that is firmly embedded in the fabric of nature. It is a reminder of how things really are, the rhythmic dance to which we unavoidably belong.”

The observance of Sabbath, in its highest intention, does not limit activities that one may engage in on a specified day, nor does it mandate setting aside an entire day. Sabbath is time we consciously choose to set aside to honor ourselves and our unity in God. According to the creation story in Genesis, God rested on the seventh day. God didn’t get dressed up and go to church, or catch up on what was missed during the six days of creating the world. God rested. The story reminds us that rest is an integral aspect of our spiritual, as well as our human experience.

It seems, in our culture, we may have lost sight of the value of resting in conscious connection in the One. I affirm that it is time for us to return to observing Sabbath. It is time for us to stop the violence of pushing ourselves beyond our limits. It is time for us to begin to care for ourselves. When we begin to take time to care for ourselves we will begin to take a little more time to care for each other and for our world. Perhaps an archaic concept, such as ‘Sabbath,’ can help save us from ourselves. It is certainly a concept that I intend to explore for myself beginning now.

I invite you to join us this Sunday as we explore and experience Sabbath. It will be a time to rest, renew and remember. Our service will include extended periods for quiet contemplation and meditation. Discover how remembering the Sabbath can make a difference in your life.

In observance of Memorial Day, we will also have an opportunity to remember and give thanks not only for the men and women who have served in our armed forces, but also for those individuals whose lives have touched ours.

Get Out of the Way

As I sit here staring at the blank computer screen, hands on the keyboard, struggling for what to write, the thought comes, “You have to write something.” I immediately feel tension in my body, my stomach churns, and my mind is flooded with thoughts of incompetency and unworthiness. These thoughts are NOT HELPFUL!

I close my eyes, take a deep breath and smile as the thought arises, “Get out of the way!” The still, small voice for God tells me to move aside. I am reminded of Jesus’ teaching in which he encouraged his disciples,

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life…Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them…Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these… And do not keep striving for what you are to eat and what you are to drink, and do not keep worrying. For it is the nations of the world that strive after all these things, and your Father knows that you need them. Instead, seek the kingdom of God, and these things will be given to you as well. – Luke 12: 22-31

I am astounded when I reflect on all the times I get in the way of the flow of God in and through my life. I am astonished when I become consciously aware of all the worrying, toiling and striving I engage in on a daily basis. I worry about not being good enough or having enough. I toil and spin in order to achieve success, by whatever measure I choose to define it at that particular time. I strive for prosperity. And, I create anxiety for myself in the process. “Oh, you of little faith! Get out of the way!” says the voice of God within.

As I stop to consider the raven and other birds, I notice that they seem to be guided by an internal sense of knowing. They alight on a tree branch, take flight often without provocation, build nests when needed, and eat when they are hungry. They live seemingly by instinct. They don’t appear to worry about even their basic needs - where the next meal will come from or if they will have the materials needed for their nests. They are simply being birds.

Likewise, the lilies of the field grow from the seeds or bulbs that are planted in the ground and nurtured by the soil, rain and sun. They take root where they are planted, then sprout and flower at the perfect time in concert with nature. They share their beauty and fragrance with the world. They are not concerned with whether or not they are appreciated or how they may compare to the roses or other flowers.

Some might think it unfair, however, for Jesus to compare us to birds and lilies. They know nothing of our human concerns, such as money, health, relationships and the like. They don’t have to get out of the way because there is nothing in their way. Oh!

Jesus’ comparison was intentional. He was not being flippant. His lesson was calculated. Jesus embraced and embodied the Kingdom of God consciousness, the consciousness of Oneness in God. He knew, as Unity’s first basic principle states, that there is One Presence and One Power expressing in all life. He knew that the same power that inspires birds to build nests and find food, is the same power that moves in and as each of us to guide us to all we need in every moment. He knew that the same power that enfolds the beauty and fragrance of the lilies in the seed is the same power that enfolds within us the potential flowering of our true selves.

His encouragement to his disciples and to all of us to seek (and find) the Kingdom of God within us is to know our unity in the One Presence and One Power, the Source of creation, and to allow ourselves to be inspired to act in alignment with the inner knowing of our True Nature. In other words, he is instructing us to get out of the way and allow the Kingdom of God to express through us. This does mean that we are to just sit back and trust that everything will come to us. It does not mean that we do not act. The birds still seek out food and build nests; they just do it without stress and struggle.

We seek (and find) the Kingdom of God through the practices of prayer and meditation, centering our awareness in the conscious knowing of the One Power and One Presence. In the silence of our hearts and minds, we listen for the still small voice of God. We then follow, and act on the inspiration we receive. And from that knowing, we do so in peace, letting all else just be as we move in harmony with what already is.

Join us on Sunday for our 10:00 service as we identify some of the ways we get in the way and explore some of the practices that can help us get out of the way.

Motherly Love

Each year as Mother’s Day comes around, I think of my mother who died in 1976. I was 15-years old at the time. We were always very close. I guess you could say I was a “mama’s boy.” As a child, I never wanted her to be too far out of sight. I would be highly upset if I was playing at a friend’s house and came home to find that she had gone to the store without me. She was my “safety zone.” I always knew that no matter what, she was the one person I could depend on to take care of me.

She was always the fun mom. I have vivid memories of her playing kickball and softball with me and the other kids in the neighborhood. There were no other moms playing ball out in the middle of dirt road we lived on.  Everyone wanted to play at Miss Judy’s house.

She was a stay at home mom, so she was always there when we left for school in the morning and when we got home in the afternoon. I recall very few mornings when she did not have a pot of grits, fried bacon and eggs ready for breakfast, whether or not any of us wanted to eat them. I shudder to think how many pots of congealed grits were either thrown in the trash or fed to our dogs. Yes, we fed table scraps to our dogs! It was a special treat to come home from school occasionally to a freshly made lemon meringue pie or chocolate chip cookies.

Every other year she was a “room mother” during my elementary school years. She did the same for my sister on the alternating years. If you are not familiar with the “room mother” concept; a “room mother” was one who helped to plan and present the class parties during the year. They made cookies and cupcakes and brought them to the classroom for all of us to enjoy. I felt such joy and pride when my mother would show up on those special occasions and share some of her love and joy with my friends at school. When I went to middle school and later to high school, she was present for every choir concert, every church program, and while there were only a few, for every little league baseball game.

I was devastated when she and my sister died tragically in a car accident. She was 35 and my sister was 16. In an instant, all of that love, care and safety were gone. At least, it seemed so at the time.

I was soon to discover that the gift of Motherly Love is not restricted to the one who gave me birth. Many loving, caring people were there to surround me with love and support, but one in particular. Her name is Kathy. She is the mother of the first friend I met when we moved into the house I lived in for most of my youth. Her daughter, Janet, and I became fast friends in our inflatable pool that summer. She and I spent many hours playing in our adjoining yards. Our mothers became good friends as well.

After the accident, Kathy embraced my brother and me in love and care. She opened her arms and her home, and we became part of her family. Today, nearly 40 years later, she still considers me her son. Her daughters often joke that I am her favorite. They plead with me to come visit because they say she is much happier when I’m around. I don’t know if that’s true, but it makes me feel good to think it is.

I don’t mean to suggest that my life was ideal, or that my mother was a saint. She could get angry, and be very vocal about it. She punished me with spankings, which today some might consider child abuse. She was not always jovial; she was often sad and lonely. She, like the rest of us, was dealing with her own “stuff,” and my siblings and I were caught up in all of that. Then, later, Kathy was often over-protective and, at times over-bearing, especially for a 15-year old boy. I have spent many hours and a great deal of money in therapy working through “mother issues.” Still, I had a good childhood.

I know that I have been fortunate. I realize that there are many who did not have the experiences of motherly love that I enjoyed. I realize that many of you who are reading this had very different experiences with your mother. I recognize that there are many children in the world, indeed many in our city, who do not have someone to show them motherly love. Like me, many no longer have their mothers in physical form. Also, there are many mothers who wanted children that never came to be, or have experienced the loss of a child. For some, the grief is still very present and new. For others, the grief remains, yet not so fresh or intense. Regardless, I recognize that Mother’s Day can be a painful reminder for many of what is lost or what never was. My heart breaks open with empathy and compassion for you.

It is good to honor our earthly mothers for giving us life and for being the expression of the Divine that each of them is; even if they were not able to see it within themselves, thus not able to reflect it to us. As children, we were dependent upon someone else to give us love and attention, to teach us that we matter and to acknowledge our worth. Now that we are adults, we can choose to know and claim that we matter and are worthy of love simply because we are. No one can bestow it upon us, and no one can deprive us of it.

This Mother’s Day, I encourage us to recognize and celebrate that the energy of Motherly Love is our divine inheritance. It is who and what we are. It is not something that comes to us from another, although others may demonstrate it for us: Motherly Love comes through us and lives as us. It matters not whether we are currently embodied in a female or male physical form, each of us is the energy of the Divine Mother in expression. Motherly Love is the Divine Feminine as us, and we must awaken it within ourselves.

Begin by thinking of one person, female or male, who embodies the energy of Motherly Love for you. It may be someone you know personally, or someone you have read or heard about. Spend some time contemplating the qualities of this person. Accept that those qualities are innate within you as well. Allow yourself to ruminate on those qualities and bring your vibration into resonance with them. Feel the energy of them and experience every cell of your being imbued with the energy of them. See yourself filled with this energy and radiating it out into the world. Know that through the power of intention it is done. Use this mediation to embody the energy of Motherly Love. Envision yourself going into every interaction filled with the radiant energy of Motherly Love. Allow Love to show you the way. Let Love guide every thought, word and action.

I encourage us not to discount the significance of realizing this Truth. The expression of Motherly Love has the power to transform the world, and we have a role to play. We must consciously choose to embrace and embody the energy of Motherly Love and immerse ourselves in it so that we can reflect it to each other, especially the children. We are the ones who are here to share Motherly Love for ourselves, and with all - through our care, compassion, nurture and giving.

As Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” We must know ourselves as Motherly Love in expression and choose to be it. Together we can change the world.

Please join us on Sunday at 10:00 for our service as we celebrate Motherly Love inherent in each of us.