Radical Hospitality

In my post last week I referenced “Mind the Gap”, a phrase that originated in the London Underground to remind passengers to be aware of the space between the train door and the landing platform. Bestselling author, Brené Brown, Ph.D., in her book, Daring Greatly, suggests that we adopt this phrase as a way to remind ourselves to be mindful of the gaps that sometimes develop between our aspired values, the values we hold dear and strive to live from, and our practiced values, the ways we are actually showing up in the world. These gaps present themselves for us individually, as well as in our businesses and our spiritual communities.

My assumption is that if asked the question, “Are we a loving and welcoming church?” that most church members would answer an unequivocal ‘Yes!’  The churches I have been a part of, whether as a member or minister, have expressed an intention to be open, inviting and inclusive. Without exception, each of those ministries believed that they were exceptional at fulfilling those intentions. Because those who are reflecting upon the question are members who are involved in the church, the answer seems apparent. They, after all, are the ones who are the recipients of the love and inclusion. However, for some churches, the answer of whether they are welcoming and inclusive may not be quite so obvious to one who is visiting for the first time.

Pastor of Saddleback Church and author Rick Warren, in his book, A Purpose Driven Church, points out that a loving church is not always a welcoming and inclusive church. He says that if all the love is directed toward those who are already a part of the community, the ministry is at risk of becoming a closed circle that newcomers are unable to break into. We could benefit from “Minding the Gap” as we welcome and include our guests.

It is important for us to reflect honestly and to seek feedback from others as we assess the potential gap. This is certainly not intended to be a tool for self-criticism, rather it is an invitation to see ourselves through the perspective of one who is unfamiliar with our facilities, programs, staff and operations. We have all had the experience of being new to a group, whether in school, a new job, or a new church, so we know that it can be a bit scary. One who is venturing into a church for the first time is often doing so with some trepidation. They are allowing themselves to be vulnerable because they are seeking to meet a need, such as connection, inspiration, or community to name a few. As members of the church, we are afforded the privilege to do our best to meet those needs and help them feel safe, welcome, loved and included.

While we want to take care not to overwhelm a guest with solicitous attention, we want to foster a consciousness of “radical hospitality.” Just as we would take care to welcome guest into our homes, we take equal, if not greater care, to ensure that they are welcome in our spiritual home. We greet everyone with courteous enthusiasm. We introduce them to other members of our family. We invite them to share a meal with us. We treat them as honored members of our community. As William Butler Yeats once said, “There are no strangers here; only friends you haven’t met yet.”

Join us on Sunday at 10:00 AM at Unity Church of Denver as we explore further what it means to come together with the intention to co-create a culture of “radical hospitality” and experience for yourself the transforming power of feeling loved, being included and knowing that you are truly welcome here.