You Matter

As I have shared in my two most recent posts, I am rereading and, in fact, studying in earnest the book The Gifts of Imperfection by author, speaker and research professor Brené Brown Ph.D. I read it for the first time last year, and I am now, upon revisiting it, recommitting to consciously integrating the information and wholeheartedly engaging in some of the practices Dr. Brown offers in her book.

I am willing and ready to join what Dr. Brown refers to as a “Wholehearted Revolution - a small, quiet, grassroots movement that starts with each of us saying, ‘My story matters because I matter’.” And, I invite you to join me.

In order to live a wholehearted life, we must be willing to do the work and go through the process of discovering and working through step-by-step the things that we continue to allow to get in the way of living and loving wholeheartedly.

There is no one-size-fits-all method to living a wholehearted life. Life is continually unfolding and in order for us to live wholeheartedly we must be willing to be in relationship with it in the moment, and we must be willing to practice courage, connection and compassion in order to break free from the limited concept of self that we have taken on from the world around us. We must be willing to dare to live from a deep and abiding connection with our spirit, soul, divine self, or by whatever name or nature we understand it to be and express it fully in the world.

I have experienced it numerous times, yet I continue to be surprised when I begin to notice, after setting a conscious intention to make a change in my life, how everything that is unlike my stated intention begins to show up in some way. As I firmly declared that I choose to live a wholehearted life, I knew that I was inviting the awareness of all I have allowed to get in the way of such a life. I have discovered that the process of moving through is usually not pain-free, but experience has proven to me, and so now I trust, that greater freedom and joy await on the other side.

Today, I am keenly aware of the many of the ways I learned to suppress my joy and creativity in order to fit in and experience love, at least what I was told and believed as a child was love. It was a pseudo-love, at best. It was most certainly a conditional love. I felt loved as long as I did what was acceptable in the eyes of others. I learned that it was not safe to be vulnerable and certainly not suitable to be authentic. Gratefully, I am continuing to unlearn those things day by day.

I know that I am not alone. We are all taught by our families, peers, churches, and culture who we are to be and how we are to behave in order to be loved and to belong. Unfortunately, most of us are not encouraged to be who we innately are because others are often uncomfortable with that. Instead, we are molded to satisfy what best suits the authority figures in our lives.

We do not need to tackle a lifetime of learning all at once. We can give ourselves permission to take it one step at a time, even if those steps are baby steps. We can begin today by connecting with our creative spirits through music, art, cooking, writing, singing, or in whatever form creativity presents. We can lean into our natural state of joy by connecting with the beauty of nature all around us, expressing gratitude for all that we enjoy in our lives, or by dancing around the room to Pharrell Williams’ song, “Happy”. To explore creativity that brings us joy, and to do it wholeheartedly means we get to do it regardless of what someone else might think, do or say.

A commitment to wholehearted living requires us to be willing to connect with and have the courage to express our true nature with vulnerability and authenticity. As author and spiritual leader, Marianne Williamson said, “as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” By practicing wholehearted living we let our unique light shine, and by doing so others are encouraged to do the same. 

I support you in knowing that your story matters because you matter. You matter simply because you are. Let’s join the “Wholehearted Revolution” and commit to living and loving with our whole being.