The Power of Curiosity

I love how my lessons often present themselves in the most unexpected ways and from the unlikeliest people.

Needing to rent a car this past Saturday and not having anyone around to transport me to the car rental location, I arranged for an Uber driver to pick me up at Unity Spiritual Center Denver and drive me there. I have used Uber many times and have had great experiences. This one was no different. It was a pleasant ride in a very nice comfortable vehicle. The only difference was the conversation I had with the driver and what it stimulated for me.

Using the Uber app on my phone, I entered my destination address and confirmed my ride. A few seconds later, a driver responded accepting the fare. Being a thoughtful and careful Uber customer, I looked at his photo, profile and license plate number to ensure that I would not get into someone else’s vehicle.

His profile read, “husband, father and follower of Christ.” My mind immediately went to, “Oh, crap, I hope he’s not an evangelical who wants to have a conversation about religion.” 

Here’s how the conversation went:

Driver: Where are you going?

Me: I’m going to rent a car to drive to Kansas City.

Driver: Oh, what are you doing in Kansas City? I grew up there. (Of course, he did.)

Me: I’m going to a convention.

Driver: What kind of work do you do?

Me: I’m a Unity minister, and I’m going to our annual convention. (In my mind – Uh oh, here it comes.)

Driver: What kind of church is Unity?

Me: Umm, umm, umm…Unity is grounded in Christianity, but from a metaphysical perspective. We are somewhat different from traditional Christianity.

Driver: How so?

Me: Well…we follow the teachings of Jesus. We believe that he was here to teach us how to live. We believe that we are all sons and daughters of God, not just Jesus. We teach that God is within us all.

Driver: That is quite different. So, you don’t believe in Jesus as savior?

Me: (In my mind – How much longer is this ride?) Well, that is a much longer conversation, but in short, not in the traditional sense. I was raised in the Baptist church, so I used to believe that (why did I go there?), but I have a different understanding of it now.

Driver: That’s a big shift. Why did you change.

Me: (Nearing my destination) After studying more about the history of Christianity and of the Bible, I could no longer believe in a judgmental condemning God or much of the traditional interpretations of Scripture. Unity offered me a God of love and acceptance and a deeper understanding of Jesus’ teaching.

Driver: Have a nice trip.

Me: Thank you. Have a great day. (in my mind – thank God that’s over).

I have an idea that he and I could have sat down over coffee and had a more in-depth conversation about this, but there was not time. In hindsight, I wish I had asked him more about what he believes. Because his profile said, “follower of Christ,” I made the bold assumption that he subscribes to a more traditional Christian theology and would be critical of me and Unity philosophy. The truth is, I don’t know that my assumption was correct.

This encounter brought a few things home to me. Many people have expressed in meetings, surveys, classes and one-to-one conversations that they would like to be able to tell someone about Unity in just a few sentences. Obviously, I would like to know that as well. Additionally, I came face-to-face with my own fear around sharing my beliefs with others when I think that they will not agree or will be in judgment of me. So, I am committing myself to (1) moving past my fear of speaking my truth (2) coming from curiosity for myself and others, and (3) either finding or devising a succinct statement about Unity that I can commit to memory.

I have empathy and compassion for myself and others when it comes to the fear of sharing truth with those who do not agree, especially if one’s beliefs are contrary to the prevailing cultural norms. Whether in this lifetime or in past lifetimes, many of us have faced persecution for speaking alternate truths, and history is replete with examples. Jesus’ disciples denied being his followers to protect their lives. Although we know there were more economic reasons, the Europeans’ slaughter of Native people was justified by claiming they were “savages.” Those judged as witches were burned at the stake. Mormons were massacred because of their beliefs. I have wondered whether the early pioneers of the New Thought movement in the United States made the conscious decision to associate the movement with Christianity to avoid similar persecution. Perhaps not, but it would be understandable.

It makes sense that we might be reluctant to share ideas that others could consider to be heretical or blasphemous. In fact, there may be times when it is not safe to share, and it is important for us to honor that. However, those occasions are most likely rare.

In this case, the Uber driver asked the question. My opportunity was to be curious about him and why he was asking the question and to answer him with love and as clearly as I could in the moment. While I did my best at the time, I know that I was reacting from my discomfort, rather than being centered in love for myself and for him. Who knows, perhaps we were brought together so that I could share the message with him. Maybe he went home and researched Unity. Maybe he will come to service on Sunday. I don’t know. It is not mine to know. It is simply mine to be open and honest and speak from love.

This was a powerful reminder of the need to practice self-connection, self-empathy and self-compassion and to meet others with presence and curiosity. Bringing curiosity to every encounter opens the way for deeper understanding of others and ourselves. In this situation, I recognize that I had already decided that I knew who my driver was and what he believed. And, my interaction with him was based on my prejudiced perspective. Even though time did not allow for an in-depth conversation, I trust that we could have enjoyed a more heartful and meaningful connection had I come from a place of loving presence and curiosity.

While I did not express myself in the way I wish I had, I can be curious about what was going on for me at the time; practice empathy, compassion and forgiveness for myself; and set a clear intention to make different choices next time. With consistent practice, I trust that I can and will.

The following is my attempt at a short “elevator speech” describing Unity. I will continue to work on it. I welcome your thoughts and suggestions.

Based on the teachings of Jesus, Unity is a path to empowered living that recognizes the spiritual unity of God, humanity and all creation. Unity encourages everyone to realize their innate power to heal in body, mind and spirit through life-affirming thoughts, words and actions.

P.S. I will be facilitating a workshop called "Ask Me About Unity" in the next couple of months. Stay tuned for more information.