As I have shared before, I frequently read and/or listen to
audio recordings of several books concurrently. Not surprisingly, I am doing so
now. In addition to The Untethered Soul
by Michael A. Singer which our small groups have been exploring and which has
been the basis for Sunday lessons over the past several weeks, I am also
engaged in Philip Shepherd’s Radical
Wholeness and Oren Jay Sofer’s Say
What You Mean. While each of the authors offers different paths and
perspectives, I find that they share a common thread – the power of presence.
Singer points out that we often engage in habitual patterns
of behavior that distract us from being fully present in the moment. For
example, we pay attention to the incessant chatter in our heads which he
humorously refers to as our “inner roommate.” Additionally, he says that, metaphorically
speaking, we construct elaborate devices to avoid our “inner thorns,” which are
memories of past events that may stimulate pain. Further, we build “houses” to
separate us from all the things we fear. He posits that the walls of our
“houses” are our psyche - our “past
experiences; thoughts and emotions; all concepts, views, opinions, beliefs,
hopes and dreams that [we] collect around [ourselves].” Singer asserts that
being present to our pain and fear is the way to freedom. He encourages us to
feel everything in the moment, to be with what is rather than hiding from or
resisting it. In short, presence is a path to freedom.
Shepherd asserts that being present in the body for all the
information accessible through our defined physical senses of taste, touch,
smell, hearing and sight, as well as to our more subtle senses, is the path to
experiencing the wholeness of life. He says that our culture teaches us to
separate ourselves from each other and from the world around us, thereby
cutting us off from our connection to the Life Energy that moves through and as
all creation. He offers practices to help the reader to connect with “the body’s
energy.” He defines ‘the body’s energy’ as “everything
you are feeling as your life right now. It is an umbrella term covering all the
sensations that show up in the body: the energy of your emotions, ideas,
muscles, libido, breath, and of your exchanges with the Present.” In short, presence is a path to wholeness.
Sofer draws on his experience with mindfulness, somatics, and
Nonviolent Communication to present a framework for helping the reader engage
in healthy, effective communication. He says, “Effective communication depends on our ability to be present…The first
step of mindful communication is to lead with presence.” He goes further to
say that being present begins with connection with one’s own feelings, thoughts
and desires and the willingness and ability to remain present with another’s.
Further, Sofer states, “Awareness is the
primary foundation for all communication. If communication is about creating
understanding, mindful communication is about creating understanding through
awareness.” In short, presence is a path to mindful communication.
I hesitate to admit it, but at times I can be oblivious to
the messages my soul is delivering. I can easily find ways to distract myself;
however, this is not one of those times. This message is obvious and urgent –
Practice Presence. Practicing presence requires me to slow down. I have noticed
that when I am rushing from one thing to the next, focusing solely on
accomplishing a task so that I can move to the next one, I am not being
present. When I am not present, I am not truly giving of myself. Further, I am
not availing myself of the gifts of the present moment. I am now reminding
myself to SLOW DOWN.
I also find that at times I have to remind myself to breathe.
I know that may sound ridiculous considering that breathing is a process of the
autonomic nervous system. I mean that I have to remind myself to consciously breathe, to breathe deeply
and fully. Deep, full breaths relax the mind and fuel the body. Conscious
breath is one of the best ways I have found to bring my attention back to the
moment and to being present.
When I slow down and breathe consciously, I can become aware
of my ‘body’s energy,’ as Shepherd defines it. When I am connected to my body’s
energy, I can make conscious choices that support me emotionally, physically,
mentally and spiritually. From the place of conscious connection, I am more
available to connect with and support others emotionally, physically, mentally
and spiritually.
It seems that the adage, “When the student is ready, the
teacher appears” has never been more true for me. I am ready to practice
presence so that I can more fully support my own well-being and the well-being
of others. These authors are my current teachers. I invite you to join me.
I encourage us all to set aside 60 seconds three times a day
to practice presence. Set an alarm. Stop whatever you are doing immediately or
a quickly as possible. If you are at work, take a break, go to the restroom if
you need to be alone. Take a few full deep cleansing breaths. Bring all of your
awareness to the moment. Connect with your ‘body’s energy.’ What are you
thinking, feeling, and needing? Sense the energy around you. Feel the energy of
the plants, animals and other people in the space. Without judgement or resistance,
just become aware of what is. There is nothing else you need to do. Simply
practice presence. One-day-at-a-time commit to this practice for the next 12
days. Pay attention to any shifts in your perspective or in how you approach
interactions with others or engage in daily tasks.
Practicing presence is a moment-by-moment choice. No one can
do it for us. It is an inside job. And, borrowing from Alfred, Lord Tennyson it
is “closer than breathing.” It is more and more apparent, as these three
authors have expressed, that practicing presence is a path to freedom,
wholeness and meaningful connection with self and others. From where I stand,
that makes it well worth my investment of time and attention. How about you?