Monday, I
returned home to Denver from a week-long vacation in California. I had
anticipated a week of rest, rejuvenation and renewal. I was hoping for a break
from my usual routine which often seems to be filled with constant activity,
both physical and mental. If I am to be totally honest, more than just a
vacation, I was seeking a respite from myself. But, as the saying goes,
“Wherever you go, there you are.” That certainly proved to be true.
While I was
able to rest, relax and rejuvenate physically in the beautiful surroundings of
a friend’s home in San Diego for a few days, and in a private garden apartment
in Oakland over the weekend, I was unable to escape from my mental activity and
what, at times, seems to be a compulsion for self-reflection and contemplation.
It began at
Denver International Airport the day of our departure. As we moved through the
security checkpoint line I found myself becoming keenly aware of the other
people standing in line waiting their turn. As we passed through security and
made our way to the tram that would take us to our terminal, I continued to
notice, in a way I had not done before, the crowd of people riding up and down
the escalator on their way to an airplane that would take them somewhere or
from an airplane that had recently delivered them to Denver.
I wondered,
“How many people fly on commercial aircraft on an average day?” Fortunately,
with the aid of modern technology, answers to questions such as that are in the
palms of our hands. When I arrived at the gate I looked it up on my iPhone. I
was amazed to learn that over 8 million people travel by airplane on an average
day. That more than 3 billion people fly annual was an even more astounding
statistic.
Becoming
aware of my fellow human beings at the airport that day triggered a
contemplation that continued throughout the week, and on which I am still
ruminating.
I wondered
about their lives. Where had they been? Where are they going? What is going on
in their lives? What are they concerned about? What do they care about? What
really matters to them? I realize that the answers to those questions are as
diverse as the people themselves.
My awareness
continued as we arrived in San Diego, picked up our rental car and ventured out
into rush hour traffic. Again, I was acutely aware of the people, this time in
cars going to and from places I have never been and have no knowledge of.
I was
curious. What must their lives be like? How different are their lives from
mine? What really matters to them?
I wondered,
if they, like me, often don’t notice others around them because they get so
caught up in their own daily mental and physical activities. Are we so focused
on just making it through another day that we don’t take time to consider each
other?
This brought
me to a deeper question, “Does most of what we do on a daily basis really
matter?” More specifically, I wondered, “Does what I do on a daily basis really matter?
I realized
more intensely than ever before the infinitesimal part each of us plays in the
whole of humanity. I wondered whether there is any real significance to my minuscule part in it all. And, if so, what?
Ultimately,
I questioned, “Does one life, specifically my
life, really matter?”
This led me
to question whether it is important to me for my life to matter. I wondered if I
am on some Ego trip. Do I want people to notice me? Do I want to be special? Do
I want to leave a legacy? Do I want my life to matter so that people will
admire and honor me? I have pondered those questions and come to the conclusion
that, no, that’s not really it.
I wondered
if my question was more about whether I am making a meaningful contribution to
others or to humanity in general, and whether that is really what matters to
me. Do I want what I do and who I am to matter to others because I contribute
to their lives? Well, yes, I want to contribute to others in ways that are
meaningful to them. Yet, that still did not capture the essence of my
questioning.
After
considerable contemplation and consternation, I think I have arrived at the
crux of the matter. Rather than, “Does my life matter?” the question became,
“What matters to me, and am I serving it to the best of my ability?” When I
landed there it felt like a truer and more honest question. I felt some relief
and an inner knowing that if I can connect with what truly matters to me and do my
best to serve it, I will live a life that matters.
I do believe
that what matters to each of us is ultimately what matters. Further, if we are
living our lives in service to what truly matters to us in ways that are
compassionate and loving to others and ourselves, we are contributing to the
overall well-being of the whole.
Additionally,
I recognized that what matters to us is informed by many things, including our
unique expression of God/Creative Life Force/Source, which some refer to as our
‘soul,’ also by our life experiences, as well as by situations and circumstances
in the world that touch us and open our hearts. Also, what matters to us is not
static. It is fluid and changes as we grow and change.
Over the
course of the past days, I have recognized more powerfully than ever before
that in the great journey of humanity I am but one traveler among billions, and
that we are companions on the path, co-creating this experience we call life.
It may appear that we are doing it independently; yet, we are inextricably
connected to the whole. Further, everything we do matters in some way.
I encourage
us to recognize that every life matters. Every thought matters. Every word
matters. Every action matters. My hope
and prayer is that we all connect deeply with what matters to us, and do our
best to allow every step we take to be in service to it while honoring and
valuing each other along the way.
Join us on
Sunday at 10:00 as we explore “Living a Life that Matters.”